OMG – I am very sorry to report that I have lost my superpower of being able to speak when drunk. Up until very recently, I have been blessed with the ability to speak and still sound completely coherent even though I’ve gone one, or possibly two, over the edge.

I think there is a strong correlation between this loss and turning 50 but last night definitely ended in a blur and I woke up this morning like black eyed Susie, to quite my mum, with my mascara all over my face, but thankfully not on the pillow. Apparently, I was a very sore loser at Articulate – oh dear!

Unfortunately, it was my turn to do tea/coffee/breakfast so off to the kitchen I trotted only to discover the tub of ice cream in the fridge that I had put there when dinner was served to soften a little with the intention of having it for dessert. It hadn’t even collapsed and was just like big mountains of fluffy marshmallow snow – only not cold! It must’ve been a good quality one or else it wound have collapsed on the bottom of the tub in a watery mess. I can’t believe I forgot all about it.

The sun was shining and very inviting so after a long relaxing morning of just chilling and reading the papers – congratulations Keir Starmer, by the way – we sat in the garden. Not in a park or at the beach or on a park bench but just in our house. Come on people – we’re in lockdown not on holiday – this is serious and it is killing many of us. When politicians are found out, I’m usually not a fan of them resigning as I prefer them staying to help sort out the mess. However, the Scottish Chief Medical Officer’s actions left me speechless today and I just cannot figure out what she was playing at. She deserved to fall on her sword and I have no sympathy for her at all. Even The Queen is coming to talk to us a week ahead of Easter to give us a lift.

When we got married 17 years’ ago, the sun was absolutely cracking the flags and we had an amazing day. It was just so lovely all this time later to be chilling out in our home, reading and doing puzzles. Apparently, and I know this because I checked, both the traditional and modern gift for the 17th wedding anniversary is furniture. What a rubbish present idea!

One site said, “…gift for 17th wedding anniversary is furniture, this can be anything that furnishes your home. Traditional gem jewellery can be affordable. Buy now!” Hilarious as I’d choose gems any day of the week. I am usually very mercenary and materialistic but this year, I was absolutely delighted to have no flowers and a spare card from a previous anniversary as it kept my husband safe. My parents sent us a photo of our present in a “look what you could have won” sort of way. I’m pretty sure it’s not furniture as it was bottle shaped, thank goodness.

Dave, my husband – we’re on Day 13 of this blog so about time he got a look in – has always been one for reading his daily paper. On a Sunday, he would quite often spend hours and hours poring over the Sunday Times but it only took him an hour today as there is very little in it. What he really means is there is very little sport or travel being reported and he is missing this greatly.

I rarely have time to read a newspaper as I choose to do other stuff but I always make a conscious effort to read the fashion and trashy parts of the weekend press. There was a lovely little piece from one of the editors explaining that although we can’t go out and buy all these things at the moment, we do need something to look forward to and keeping some sort of normality will help us through this.

Even the fashion pages were covered with items about how to be supercool and on-trend when you are walking the dog. We don’t have a dog as I’m highly allergic but it has given me some ideas for what to wear when I’m working from home and how I should dress a bit better for our daily exercise walk or, let’s be honest, even taking the bins out.

It looks like yellow is the colour du jour. I LOVE yellow but it has never really loved me and the added terrifying disadvantage is it attracts bees and wasps. I might just be able to carry it off with these black/grey roots coming through and not look quite so much like a big bird from Sesame Street.

As I passed through the conservatory-cum-dining room-cum home office for me into the garden, I clocked the tablecloth. What a disaster – I’ve never seen so much curry on a tablecloth since we fed a couple of toddlers! We’ll have to use the tomato trick of washing it with usual detergent and hanging the trashed part up in sunlight. Our brother-in-law is an industrial chemist and swears by it as it apparently breaks down some such blah blah blah because of blah blah blah and blah. It’s times like these that I wished I’d paid more attention so I can be more knowledgeable and be more useful. Anyway, try it, it really does work.

My List: Started my new book, Living My Best Li(f)e by Claire Frost – it’s a good old chick lit with a very modern twist; did some new puzzles – I’ve been introduced to keijo which is a cross between sudoku and shapes plus did an arrow word which brought back lots of lovely childhood memories; finished setting up my new phone; & watched some tv. It’s truly a rock & roll anniversary in our house!

My lowlight: Poor Boris has been taken to hospital.

My highlight: Just chilling and reading in the “garden” – our small 20 x 15 city patio overlooked by the world and his wife.

My Anxiety levels: Low as still very very very chilled.


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